A Peek into my Subconscious

I've been interested in dreams lately. I had an idea for a story about dreams, and then started researching to learn more about them, and in the process started recording my own dreams and then looking up interpretations for them. If the interpretations are valid, I think my subconscious is frustrated with my life as it is today and is hankering for some kind of change.

For example, after family scripture reading this morning, Steven left with the older boys to go to seminary and Peter and I went back to our beds. I had an interesting dream, and when I woke up, I wrote it down, and later I looked up symbols. This is what I dreamed this morning (Symbols are quoted from Dream Moods Dream Dictionary):

I slowly made my way through deep puddles (Puddle: To see a puddle in your dream represents feelings that have been downplayed and overlooked. Although these feelings may appear minor, it is worthwhile to address them before it erupts unexpectedly.) and mud (Mud: To dream that you are walking in mud suggests that you are feeling weighed down by a situation, problem, or relationship. You are feeling frustrated.) to the large truck (Truck:To see a truck in your dream suggests that you are overworked. You are taking on too many tasks and are weighed down by all the responsibilities.) dominating the small parking lot (Parking Lot: To dream that you are in parking lot suggests that you need to slow down and take time from your daily activities.). I climbed in, and realizing that it didn't belong to me (Stealing: To dream that you are stealing suggests that you are feeling deprived. Alternatively, stealing signifies unrealized and unfulfilled goals. You may have set your goals too high.), I drove it out of the parking lot and into the street (Street: To see a street in your dream symbolizes your life's path. The condition of the street reflects how much control you have over the direction of your life. ). I arrived at the mall (Mall: To dream that you are at the mall symbolizes the choices, decisions and options you have in your waking life. These choices will help shape who you are as a person. You are trying to establish your identity and sense of self.) and walked inside. Looking through the stores (Shopping: To dream that you are shopping symbolizes your needs and desires. It also represents opportunities and options that you come across in life. Consider what you are shopping for and what needs you are try to fulfill.), I noticed a shoe store and thought it would be good to get some new shoes (Shoes: In general, shoes represent your approach to life. Wearing shoes in your dream suggests that you are well-grounded or down to earth. It also represents your convictions about your beliefs. If you are changing your shoes, then it refers to your changing roles. You are taking a new approach to life.). As I approached the store, however, there was a lady in the entrance acting as a sort of "bouncer" (Bouncer: To see a bouncer in your dream means that you are suppressing your desires.). I was asked to wait (Waiting: To dream that you are waiting is indicative of issues of power/control and feelings of dependence/independence, especially in a relationship. Alternatively, the dream may denote your expectations and anxieties about some unknown situation or decision. You are experiencing a sense of anticipation or uneasiness.) to enter the store until an attendant (Salesperson: To see or dream that you are a salesperson suggests that there is something you need to incorporate in your life. However, you need to make sure that it is right for you and not what someone else wants for you. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you are open to changes and to looking at things from a different perspective.) was available to wait on me. Eventually I was allowed to enter. I told the attendant I would like a new pair of athletic shoes (Athlete: To dream that you are an athlete suggests that you have pushed yourself to the limits. You have achieved something which you thought you could not do.). She nodded, and then led me to an area in the back of the store where she started pulling out various items, including a T-shirt (T-Shirt: To see or wear a T-shirt in your dream suggests that you need to take it easy and relax. Alternatively it represents your honesty and genuineness, especially in your personal relationships. Consider also if there is a design or saying on the T-shirt.) with a picture of Amy Pond (from Doctor Who) on it. She also pulled out some kind of clear paint (Paint: To see paint in your dream symbolizes expression of your inner emotions. Consider the color of the paint and how the color makes your feel. It is this feeling that you need to express more in your waking life. Transparent: To dream that something is transparent indicates feelings of vulnerability. You are able to see things and see through people and their motives. Thus the dream may be symbolic of your actions and your true intentions. Alternatively, if something is transparent, then it represents clarity and understanding.) and started painting (Painting: To see a painting in your dream represents creativity and your need for self-expression. The painting is symbolic of your intuition and inner realizations.) over the image on the shirt. I thought she was trying to transfer the image onto something else. Then she pulled out slabs of wood (Wood: To dream of wood suggests that you are feeling dead and emotionless inside. Your behavior is too automated. You are not fully thinking things through), and I thought she was going to build some sort of doll house (Dollhouse: To see or play with a dollhouse in your dream suggests that you are idealizing family life. You have the notion that everything is perfect or problem-free. Perhaps you are in denial about any problems. Alternatively, the dollhouse in your dream may serve as an indirect way to solve and work out waking problems with family members.), and she was painting lines and things on that too. I was wondering how I was going to lug a large doll house back out through the mall, when I noticed Peter (Son: To see your son in your dream signifies your ideal, hopes, potential, and the youthful part of yourself.) carrying the original slabs of wood in a compact package (Package: To see a package in your dream represents hidden creative energy, skills, and/or feelings.). I was escorted out of the shoe store, but I still didn't have my shoes. (Shopping (cont): To dream that you cannot find what you are shopping for suggests that you are trying to find a solution to some life problem.) On the way out of the mall, Peter and I came across a gymnasium (Gymnasium: To dream that you are in a gymnasium indicates that you need to apply what you learned and incorporate it into your daily life.). Peter puts down the slabs to play, and I notice the seat of his pants are covered in muck, and it looks like he is pooping through his pants! (Feces: To see or come in contact with feces signifies aspects of yourself that are dirty and negative and which you believe to be undesirable and repulsive. You need to acknowledge and express these feelings, even though it may be shameful. Release the negativity in your life.)  I'm disgusted by it, but the next thing I know, his pants are lying abandoned on the ground and he is contentedly playing on the jungle gym. 

 What does all this say about me? Maybe that I'm overwhelmed with my responsibilities and I need to relax and look for a new approach to life. Maybe I want to push my limits and accomplish more, but I'm having difficulty finding ways to do that. Maybe I need to find ways to express my creativity more. Maybe I need to express my feelings and emotions more clearly. Maybe I need to set aside negative things in my life.

      Maybe the dream means something totally different.

            Or maybe it doesn't mean anything at all.

                     What do you think?