The Play That Goes Wrong - by Steven

This was from Steven's letter to Hannah after we attended this funny play. Beware, there are spoilers.

So on to the exciting things here in the U.S. Friday night we went to see "The Play That Goes Wrong" at the Buell Theater which my mom bought us tickets for. It was hilarious! It was the funniest thing any of us had ever seen. We were laughing throughout the whole thing. Halfway through the first act I looked over at mom and she said she couldn't breathe because she was laughing so hard. Here is a summary:

So the premise is that this acting group is trying to put on a play called "The Murder at Haversham Manor" but everything that could possibly go wrong does. It starts with the murdered man lying dead on a couch but throughout the scene he keeps moving. Originally he has his arm stretched out on the floor but after one of the other actors steps on it you see him move his hand out of the way every time someone walks by. When it comes time to carry the body off they bring in a stretcher made from two poles with a blanket between them but the blanket rips as they lift, so the actors just pretend to carry him off anyway. The scene continues but the dead man gets up on his hands and knees and tries to sneak off unnoticed, carrying the rest of the blanket, which of course means that everyone is looking at him. In the doorway he stands up, crosses his arms solemnly across his chest and then closes the door.

The butler character keeps flubbing his lines and sometimes he looks at his hands as if he has words written there, but he doesn't always know how to pronounce them. "Oh no! It looks like he was poisoned by [looks at his hand] kai-a-ni-dee!" (cyanide) In one scene he forgets one of his lines so he says a line from earlier in the scene meaning all the other actors have to do the whole bit again, which includes the butler pouring drinks, which due to an earlier mix-up is something like paint thinner that someone found backstage, so every time someone takes a drink they end up spitting it out, but then saying something like "That is good sherry!" or "Thanks, I needed that". The scene goes round and round several times with the other actors getting increasingly annoyed at the butler character until he finally remembers the right line to say and the scene can continue.

The stagehand character is also the one who is supposed to do the audio cues but you can see him off to the side in front of the stage listening to music on his phone and not paying attention much. The actors on stage will say a line and then they all freeze waiting for the doorbell to ring or whatever but the stagehand doesn't notice. Finally he realizes what is going on and starts frantically pushing buttons but ends up playing a bit of the Duran Duran music he has been listening to on his phone before finally getting the right cue out. Then the actors can unfreeze. "There's the doorbell! It must be the inspector." and the scene continues after the actors had been frozen there for way too long.

The female character gets knocked out at one point when another character comes in and swings the door open too fast hitting her in the face. She is laying on the ground passed out and the other actors are wondering what to do because she should have lots of lines and action at this point. So they say their lines and then pause for her lines. "Calm down miss, you're getting hysterical!" [pause while looking at her on the ground] "No need to raise your voice like that madam!" [pause] "Where are you going?" [pause] "She's left." Then they keep going, just stepping over her and the scene continues on another part of the stage. But meanwhile some actors backstage and the stagehands reach through the window on the set to try to lift the woman off the stage. But they keep banging her head against the set or dropping her and it takes four or five tries to get her out. The next time that character is supposed to come on stage though they have the female stage manager play her part. She has the woman's costume on over her stage manager clothes and she has to read her lines from a script. At first she is really nervous and just reads dryly but the longer she is there the more comfortable she becomes until she starts to add her own personality into it. Until someone opens the door too fast and hits her in the face and knocks her out. One of the actors and the stagehand carry her off, and then the actor hands the script to the (male) stagehand and has him read the female part lines! When he reads "Kiss me you fool" he just looks up from the script and says "Nope." Later the stage manager revives and is able to carry on with the female role and halfway through the second act the original female actress has revived and wants to take over but by this time the stage manager is enjoying it so tries to push the other woman off the stage. The two of them keep competing, each trying to get in front of the other or saying the lines first and eventually get into a full on fight backstage which you can see through the window on the set.

The set itself is almost a character in an of itself. Before the show even began the stagehand guy comes on stage to make sure everything is ready and closes the main door but as he turns to leave it swings open again. He shuts it again but again it reopens. This happens several times until the stage manager lady comes on and helps get it shut. When the play starts and the actors are supposed to enter through the door but they find that it is now stuck. You can hear them talking on the other side and you see the door handle turning but the door won't open. They eventually go around the set through the black curtains on the side. On the walls are pictures and other things that keep falling down. At one point the actors are holding up things on the wall so they don't keep falling and then the phone rings. They have to try to answer the phone without letting things fall. There is also a second-floor portion of the stage which has some action on it and people and props keep falling off of it and later someone knocks out the post holding it up so it tilts down while actors are up there and they have to hold on to keep from sliding off, or having any of the furniture props fall off. Throughout the scene it keeps tilting lower and lower until it falls down entirely and knocks out the stagehand guy (while he was performing the part of the female lady!) In the end of the play all of the set walls fall down and it looks like just complete chaos.

As I said, it was the funniest thing we had ever seen.