Change and Growth

In May of 2016, I wrote this blog. (Go ahead and read it... the rest of this blog will make more sense.) I had just received a new calling - something that felt overwhelming, and something that I didn't feel prepared for.

Three years and seven months later, (or a week ago Sunday) we had just had our Christmas sacrament meeting and were headed into the cultural hall for a gathering with cookies when the bishop saw me and told me he wanted to talk to me for a few minutes before I left. Following the gathering, when the crowds were thinning out, I caught the bishop's eye and he took me to his office.

"We need a primary pianist." He told me.

"Okay." I said. I already felt like I knew where he was going. Our previous primary pianist recently moved to Utah and there aren't very many people who play piano in our ward.

"We would like you to be our new primary pianist."

"Okay." Primary pianist. I could do that. Not blindfolded, probably, but still not a big deal.

"We would also like you to serve as a ward organist." The bishop continued.

"Ooookay." This was going to be more of a challenge. I haven't played the organ much in the last twenty years, and I only played for like a year before that and I was never very good at it. This was going to be a stretch.

"We will, of course, release you from your calling as Relief Society president." Of course I expected this from when he asked me to be the primary pianist, and all I could do was give a sigh of relief.

I don't remember where the conversation went from there. I think he thanked me for my service and let me know that there were going to be other changes in the ward leadership made the following Sunday as well. He reminded me that I was helping to teach the 5th Sunday lesson that next week, but that would be the last assignment he would give me in the role of RS president. I walked out of his office already feeling lighter.

Over the next week I thought about the things that were still in the works. I had a couple ministering interviews I hadn't been able to do yet. I had stuff at home that should be returned to the RS closet at church. I needed to put things in order to pass on to my successor, whoever she may be. I also thought about how I've grown and changed in the last few years.

I learned to deal with change. Neither of my counselors were the same ones I started with, and I was on my third secretary. While I served, not only did I experience a change in ward boundaries, but I also experienced the introduction of ministering, two hour church, "Come Follow Me", and many other changes that the Church has introduced in the last few years. My calling has evolved and changed a lot from when I was first called.

I had grown to love the many sisters in the ward. I had overcome my shyness when it came to talking to people I didn't recognize at church. I learned how important it is to reach out to others when we need help rather than trying to hide our problems and pretend everything is perfect. I learned the truth of the statement that we should treat everyone we meet as though they are in serious trouble, because more than half the time, they are. I gained a better understanding of some of the challenges that some people have to face, and I think that I am more compassionate. I learned that things are very rarely black and white, but are usually some shade of grey. I learned that I don't have to solve other people's problems. I don't have to carry their burdens. Often, just listening and showing them someone cares is enough to help them figure things out for themselves. I learned that everyone needs to feel like they are appreciated and loved.

I learned that the Lord uses ordinary, imperfect people to move his work forward. I learned to pray and ask for the Lord's help. I learned that the Lord really does help those who are trying to do their best. I learned to pay attention to the impulses and random thoughts that I had - usually they came from the Spirit. I learned to apologize quickly when I make mistakes, and to continually strive to do better. I learned to forgive others when they make mistakes and to do what I can to encourage and help them to do better. I learned to delegate what I could to others, to tell, teach or show them what is needed and then to accept their best efforts, even if it wasn't what I would have done. (And usually it was much better than anything I would have done!)

Anyway, it will nice to be able to relax for a while, or at least as much as I can while I try to remember how to play an organ... but once again, I know that the Lord will help me.

P.S. When they announced who the new Relief Society president was, I couldn't help but laugh... She is the same person who succeeded me as Primary President seven years ago.

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