Daddy Daughter Dance
My dad passed away a couple weeks ago. He was diagnosed with cancer a while ago. He took medicines and chemotherapy and he was in remission for a while, and then one day he went to the doctor for a checkup and learned that it was back, and throughout his body. He started taking the medicines again, but they made him feel tired and awful and weakened his immune system.
In March, my dad got sick with the flu, which turned into pneumonia. The doctors at the hospital didn't know if he was going to survive, and so I and most of my siblings travelled to see him to give him a final hug. Meanwhile, my dad decided that if he was going to die, he wanted to do it in comfort, at home. He stopped taking the cancer meds that were making him miserable and went home on hospice to sleep in his own bed, where people weren't poking at him and waking him up at all hours of the night. When I arrived and first saw him, he was sitting up in a rocking chair, looking tired, but alive. In the next couple days, he began to feel a little better. He shared his testimony of the Savior and told stories and encouraged us to continue his work in family history. After a few days of improvement, my siblings and I returned to our homes, having told him goodbye, but wondering how much longer he would be around.
Off his cancer meds, Dad continued to feel better and more energetic. He soon felt well enough that he and my mom travelled to visit as many of their children and grandchildren as they could. They stayed with us for a few days and were able to visit with our boys. When they left, I gave my Dad a hug and told him I love him, not knowing if I would see him again in this life.
When my parents returned home from their tour, Hannah was able to travel from BYU-I to spend a weekend with them.
We had a family reunion in Lava Hot Springs, Idaho, the first week in July. Dad was tired and rested a lot, but talked and gave hugs. When asked at the family talent show, he willingly pulled out a guitar and played "Ghost Riders in the Sky," an old favorite. He shared his testimony of the Savior. He also shared a dream he had, where angels showed him some sources that showed his death date as being about 3 weeks in the future. As we left to go home from that reunion, I again gave Dad a hug and told him I loved him. This time, I was pretty sure it would be the last time on this earth.
About three weeks later, on July 26th, after a fast decline, my dad passed away. I had known it was coming. I had given him hugs and told him good-bye. I know he is in a good place now and I know that because he and my mom were sealed in the temple and I was born in that covenant, he will always be my dad, and I will see him again.
Steven and I flew to Utah to attend his funeral. It's kind of convenient that neither of us is working just now so we were able to come the day before the funeral and stay until the day after the burial. It was kind of like being at another family reunion with my siblings, nieces, nephews, as well as several aunts, uncles and cousins who I hadn't seen in over twenty years. The speakers at the funeral spoke of his sense of humor and about how kind he was, especially to my mom.
One thing that several of my sisters remember is Dad teaching us to dance. In the last few months, I wrote a song to remember that. It isn't a meaningful, deep song like the one Lindy composed and sang at the funeral. It is a happy song, remembering happy times. It doesn't really have words; I started with words but realized I like the song better without them. But here are some of the words it would have started with if it did:
I loved to dance when I was young.
Dancing with Dad was so much fun!
I'd stand on his toes as we twirled 'round the room
Humming a happy tune.
For the rest of the song, imagine being taught to dance: the steps, the twirls, the glides, the fun, getting more complex as we go.
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