Judge Not That Ye Be Not Judged

This morning, our Stake Adult Furthering Religious Education Class (aka Institute for Old People) resumed. I'm not going to write about everything we discussed today. I have other things to do today.

There was one verse that particularly stood out to me. It was D&C 1:10. It says, "Unto the day when the Lord shall come to recompense unto every man according to his work, and measure to every man according to the measure which he has measured to his fellow man."

When I read this, my mind first went to part of the Lord's prayer and commentary in Matthew 6:12,14-15. The Lord said, "And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors... For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."

We will be judged the same way that we judge the people around us. If we are critical and unforgiving, then the Lord will be critical and unforgiving of us!

Our teacher shared with us a little bit of a talk given by Elder Dallin H Oaks, entitled, "Judge Not and Judging". After class I looked it up and read the entire thing. He talks about what when we should and should not judge, and by what standards we should judge. I would highly recommend it! But the part that our teacher shared was this, where Elder Oaks quotes another talk by Professor Parry:

In a BYU devotional address, Professor Catherine Corman Parry gave a memorable scriptural illustration of the consequences of judging by the wrong standards. The scripture is familiar. Martha received Jesus into her house and worked to provide for him while her sister Mary sat at Jesus’ feet and heard his word. 

But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me.And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: 

But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her. [Luke 10:40–42] 

Professor Parry comments:
Those of us with more of Martha than of Mary in us . . . do not doubt the overriding importance of listening to the Lord, [but]does the listening have to be done during dinner preparations? Would it have hurt Mary to have joined us in serving, then we all could have sat down to hear the Lord together? And furthermore, what about the value of our work in the world? If it weren’t for us Marthas cleaning whatever we see and fussing over meals, there would be a lot of dirty, hungry people in this world. We may not live by bread alone, but I’ve never known anyone to live without it. Why, oh, why couldn’t the Lord have said, “You’re absolutely right, Martha. What are we thinking of to let you do all this work alone? We’ll all help, and by the way, that centerpiece looks lovely”? 

What he did say is difficult to bear, but perhaps somewhat less difficult if we examine its context. . . . The Lord acknowledges Martha’s care: “Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things” (v. 41). Then he delivers the gentle but clear rebuke. But the rebuke would not have come had Martha not prompted it. The Lord did not go into the kitchen and tell Martha to stop cooking and come listen. Apparently he was content to let her serve him however she cared to, until she judged another person’s service: “Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me” (v. 40). Martha’s self-importance, expressed through her judgment of her sister, occasioned the Lord’s rebuke, not her busyness with the meal. [Catherine Corman Parry, “‘Simon, I Have Somewhat to Say unto Thee’: Judgment and Condemnation in the Parables of Jesus,” Brigham Young University 1990–91 Devotional and Fireside Speeches [Provo: BYU, 1991], p. 116]

If Martha hadn't been casting a judgement on Mary for not doing what Martha thought Mary should be doing, then Martha wouldn't have been chastened. It was because she was judging that she was judged herself.

While it is okay to make certain intermediate judgments in order to protect ourselves and our families from harm (as guided by the Spirit), unless we have stewardship over them (as a parent or a bishop), we have no business condemning others, or even chastising others for the sins that we perceive in them. We can't hold other people up to standards that we arbitrarily come up with, that have nothing to do with salvation. Nor can we make judgments about another person when we don't know everything about their history and circumstances and thoughts, and we can't know all that.

In class an example was given of judging another woman for not using a tablecloth for the table in Relief Society. How do we know that she didn't have a tablecloth all ready to go and just forgot it on her way out the door? How do we know if she doesn't own a tablecloth and can't afford to buy one? What if she comes from another culture where tablecloths at church are unheard of or inappropriate? What eternal celestial commandment says that the Relief Society table has to have a tablecloth? In other words, we have no business thinking anything about it. Our responsibility is to be merciful, to forgive, and to love.

As the prophet Mormon said, "And now, my brethren, seeing that ye know the light by which ye may judge, which light is the light of Christ, see that ye do not judge wrongfully; for with that same judgment which ye judge ye shall also be judged." Moroni 7:18

If we want to be judged with mercy and forgiveness, then we need to be merciful and forgiving and kind to those around us.